Whale Time: Re: Avram

Re: Avram
Kiss #2: Part 2

all stories and essays by Avram Klein

Getting Political

Diane (Gee-ah-nee) made me stop drinking, strutting, slouching, and swearing. I'm down to 160, I've got a six pack, and I'm starting to get ripped. I run, do yoga, work out, and then hope to hang out with her.

I was working for the state before I was laid off due to the budget, and I did 90 days for my community, working with our children. Now the government is paying for me to be down here, making sure America leaves no stone unturned with this whole Kadafi situation. They knew I would love the woman. They knew I was the right man for the job. They knew I would take the man down.

This other guy, the bodyguard not Kadafi's nephew, is sketchy. His name is Marcos and he's 45 and he looks like he's 55. He's ripped and bald and mulatto and he doesn't work. He makes money babysitting international sugar daddies, introducing them to rich locals. And when someone wants the rules of the government to be bent in their favor, they pay him and he talks to his friends and makes it happen.

He's not Mafia, but what he does is called politicos. He speaks like five languages and has a photographic memory, so this is what he does instead of working. He's really gross though, with a bunch of girls living in different apartments up and down Copacabana Avenue, so I've been able to convince Diane that I'm the better man.

That's the thing though, this guy is straight up nasty. Diane is so beautiful and innocent and this guy looks like a grandpa and he talks shit with high school girls making out in the bathroom and then threatens people on the phone.

If Diane allows things to become really serious between us and introduces me to this guy, I am going to say some real shit. That probably won't happen though. If we get married in the States and then work for an international company in Brazil, being paid in US dollars, then it would triple our income and then we would be political. So shit.

Go to Part 3